For at least part of 2023, I found it difficult to get motivated to read, which is unusual for me. As of today, December 19, I have read 89 books, which is fewer than normal for me, but still gives me a number of options for top ten list. I have always had a clear preference for non-fiction books, but my list this year contains all non-fiction–more accurately a mix of memoir, poetry, and non-fiction. I decided not to rank them this year because as I looked over my list, there was not an obvious order. I loved each of the books on this list.
Think Again by Adam Grant–Grant is an organizational psychologist and popular professor. In his book Think Again, he wrote about our willingness to explore our own ways of thinking with humility and to consider whether there may be different, better ways of understanding. If you’ve spent much time around me, you’ve heard me talk about the 3 questions: 1) What do you mean by that?, 2) How did you come to that conclusion, and 3) Is it possible I’m wrong? Think Again is a book length exploration of question 3.
We won’t have much luck changing other people’s minds if we refuse to change ours.-Adam Grant
The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness, and Healing in a Toxic Culture by Gabor Maté–Gabor Maté is one of the world’s experts in the area of trauma. In this book, he pushes back on a lot of our Western ideas about illness and healing. It is a long book, but each chapter could stand on its own, and each is well worth reading.
Although modern medicine’s focus on the individual organism and its internal processes isn’t wrong as such, it misses something vital: the pivotal influence of the mental, emotional, social, and natural environments in which we live. Our biology itself is interpersonal.-Gabor Maté
See No Stranger: A Memoir and Manifesto of Revolutionary Love by Valarie Kaur–If someone pinned me down and asked me for my top book of the year, I would pick See No Stranger. In a society that is increasingly divided by religious, political, and cultural lines, Kaur’s message is necessary. The subtitle, “memoir and manifesto,” is exactly right. She explores her own experiences as a Sikh-American woman, using those experiences as well as those of others, in suggesting a way of love. This book brought me to tears multiple times and filled me with hope as to what could be.
I refuse to let anyone belittle my soul, or diminish my own expansive sense of self. The more I listen, the less I hate. The less I hate, the more I am free to choose actions that are controlled not by animosity but by wisdom. Laboring to love my opponents is how I love myself.-Valarie Kaur, See No Stranger
Soul Boom: Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution by Rainn Wilson–Better known for playing Dwight Schrute on The Office, Wilson is surprisingly thoughtful writer. Although he considers himself to be a part of the Bahai faith tradition, Soul Boom is not an apologetic for Bahai, but an encouragement toward a healthier spirituality regardless of tradition. He writes an often humorous, always engaging style asking questions that I wish more people would ask of themselves and the world in which we live.
When most people think of spiritual tools for change, growth, and finding peace, they think of themselves working internally to increase serenity, perspective, and wisdom. In contemporary American culture, we rarely view a spiritual path as having much, if anything, to do with the peace, serenity, and wisdom of the totality of humanity–Rainn Wilson
Slug: And Other Things I’ve Been Told to Hate by Holly McNish– Slug may be described as a poetic memoir by the excellent British author touching largely on issues related to femininity and modern culture. Provocative to be sure (fair warning to any potential readers. she talks openly and frankly about things like sex and human bodies), McNish writes about deeper societal issues in a way that touches the heart. The poem below was my first exposure to her poetry.
Testimony: Inside the Evangelical Movement That Failed a Generation by Jon Ward– Testimony is the first of two books on my list from former members of Sovereign Grace Church. In this book, Ward writes about growing up in religious conservativism and with a father committed to political action. Ward writes about his movie from religious fanaticism and “hardcore Calvinism” to becoming a Trump critic. Notably, he is a senior political correspondent for Yahoo! News, though he previously worked with outlets as wide-ranging as Tucker Carlson to the Huffington Post. I appreciated his political insight, personal reflection, and ongoing work to navigating conflict, even with his family.
I think fundamentalism is this desire to put answers out of reach of questioning. I think one of the icebreaking statements for me has been a very simple one, it’s just: ‘I could be wrong.’ I’ve embraced that over the years and it’s been so liberating in many ways.-Jon Ward
Curveball: When Your Faith Takes a Turn You Never Saw Coming by Pete Enns–I’ve read several books by Pete Enns and this is my favorite so far. Following the theme of memoir, Enns shares the story of his maturation as a theologian. He previously served as a faculty member at the conservative Westminster Seminary, but he was let go when some of his ideas conflicted with the school. Thankfully, he continues to write and share about the Bible through books and the popular podcast, The Bible for Normal People, which he cohosts with Jared Byas. In Curveball, Enns put words to a lot of my own wrestling.
If having faith means holding on to certainty, when certainty is under “attack,” your only option as a good Christian is to go to war – even if that means killing your own.- Pete Enns
Democracy Awakening: Notes on the State of America by Heather Cox Richardson– Richardson is a history professor at Boston College, where she specializes in the Civil War and the Reconstruction Era. As an American historian, she possesses a unique vantage on the current state of America. She explores variables that have signaled warning in the past and how many of those things can be seen in our current political climate. Her words are challenging, but necessary.
While Republicans since the 1980s have insisted the symbol of the United States is the whitewashed American cowboy who dominated the West with manly individualism, in fact the key to survival in the American West was family and friends: kinship networks, trading partners, neighbors who would show up for a barn raising. Working together, across racial lines, ethnic lines, gender lines, and age lines, was what enabled people to defend their rights against a small group of elites determined to keep control of the country.― Heather Cox Richardson
When Religion Hurts You: Healing From Religious Trauma and the Impact of High Control Religion by Laura Anderson–As soon as I finished this book, I knew that I would go back and read it again in the future. There are many good books that explore trauma in general (see The Myth of Normal above) and religious trauma in particular, but Anderson’s book is one of the best I have come across. She discusses some of her own history and also provides examples from others with whom she has worked. She provides very practical strategies for coping with some of the post-traumatic reactions that can occur.
A marker of healing from religious trauma is not simply the process of deconstructing one’s worldview and identity and rebuilding a new one; it is also the willingness to remain open to shifting and changing over the course of one’s life.-Laura Anderson
The Woman They Wanted: Shattering the Illusion of the Good Christian Wife by Shannon Harris–The Woman They Wanted joins Testimony as books written by former members of Sovereign Grace. Harris was the wife of popular author and pastor, Josh Harris, who wrote, among other things, I Kissed Dating Goodbye (a book he has since renounced and stopped publishing). Shannon tells the story of the loss of self under the teaching and mentorship of CJ Mahaney (the founding pastor at SG) and other leaders at the church; however, this book also discusses the ongoing reclamation of her selfhood and her femininity. Like many of the books on this list, it may not be for everyone, but I am one who is glad she shared her story.
If your world crumbles because you have started to value or believe yourself, then let it, because it means that you were the only one holding it up. let it go. It is the only way a more supportive universe can emerge in its place.-Shannon Harris
Jason Kanz 