Simon Peter said to him, “Lord, where are you going?” Jesus answered him, “Where I am going, you cannot follow me now, but you will follow me afterward.” -John 13:36
Jesus had given his disciples his crucial command, to love as he loved. He wanted them to practice love after he left. Peter was not trying work out the nuances of Jesus’s command; he was worried about where his friend was going. Peter could not have cared less about theology at the moment, he cared that his friend was leaving. Jesus was not an abstract concept to Peter; he was flesh and blood. Jesus was Peter’s best friend.
Without giving away the next several hours completely, Jesus told Peter, “I have to go this alone my friend. As hard as it is to understand, I must go by myself.” Like Peter, I think we can miss the importance of isolation to Jesus’s mission. He would go to the cross feeling isolated from his friends and his Father. As excruciating as the cross was physically, the relational isolation would be far worse.
Jesus also knew that Peter would spend his life for the sake of the kingdom, not yet, but after. Jesus called his followers to come after him regardless of what pain the journey would bring. For some, it was martyrdom; for some it was rejection.
We each must grapple with the interplay between right understanding and right relationship. It can be good for us to understand theological nuances, but we cannot dissociate theology from our relationship with him.
Jesus, your words in John’s gospel are so powerful. You called us to lives of love with your words, yet by your life and death, you also showed us how to love. Help us to listen to you and love like you. Amen.